so. i had my consultation to get tits today.

i took an ativan bc i was getting super anxious and didn”t feel like having to deal.

everyone at the clinic was super respectful, so i definitely feel like i picked the right surgeon.

(some of his language was…. out of date but not entirely. it was a weird mixture of ‘ftm” and ‘cis” and i was like… ok. but ur trying and u haven”t called me a man and that”s good enough for me)

i tried on some different sizes. not going super big. he predicts that we the size we settled on, i might be at a large B or small C. which is about right for what i wanted.

still…. really ambivalent about the whole thing.

i just. none of it feels real i guess.