i”ve been thinking lately that maybe i need to be more sympathetic to ppl in the closet.

i mean. it isn”t that i”m not sympathetic to actual human beings in the closet, but i do spend a lot of time mocking the mega-butch-masc men in teh closet in the mm books i read.

i don”t really have a lot of sympathy for a white, cis, butch man in the closet. i literally don”t get it.

actually. on reflection it isn”t that i don”t have sympathy, i just really really cannot understand it. i can understand why qtpoc often need to stay in the ‘closet”. i can understand why ppl living in rural areas or with conservative parents. i can understand why youth of any kind might stay in the closet until they are more independent.

what i can”t understand is adult men who are privileged in pretty much every other way (than their sexuality) staying in the closet.

i just don”t get it.

although, even with the stuff i do get, i can”t really identify with any of it.

i never really had to ‘come out”. all my life i”ve been femme and ppl have been asking me if i was gay. my dad first asked me when i was like eight or something. i got bullied for it. then i started wearing skirts and makeup and whatever in highschool and that was that.

the closet is like this… conceptual construct in my brain. i can understand its function and how it works, but i don”t really know what its like on the inside.

omg i just googled it. ‘national” coming out day is on october 11. lol. i”m a little premature here.

i”m not trying to set up a value system here, though. me not understanding something is not me condeming. you don”t owe coming out to anyone, esp. not a ‘community” that is more likely to toss you under the bus than provide any real, substantive support. i also don”t think that being in the closet is… dishonest or whatever the fuck.

live ur life, do what you want, and stay safe.